Bhakti Song 96 – Struggle along with me

கூடவே போராடு

எதிலும் ஓர் குறைவில்லை ஸ்வாமி

எல்லாம் எனக்கு நிறைவாய்த் தந்தாய்.

அழகைத் தந்தாய், அறிவைத் தந்தாய்

அமைப்பாய் ஓர் வடிவைத் தந்தாய்

மதியுடன் பல திறமைகள் தந்தாய்

மாண்புடன் வாழவே வழியும் தந்தாய்

எல்லாம் தந்தது போதாதென்று

உன்னையும் தந்தாய் உய்யவேண்டி

கேட்காமலே எல்லாம் தந்தநீ

கேட்டும் ஒன்றை ஏனோ மறுத்தாய்

குட்டும் தூதனாய்க் கூடவே என்னுடன்

முள்ளாய் வாழும் “சுயத்தை” மட்டும்

கிள்ளி எறியப் பலமுறை வேண்டியும்

ஏனோ இன்னும் இரங்க மறுத்தாய்

என் குறையில் உன் பெலன் விளங்க

பல வழிகள் உனக்கே இருந்தும்

ஏனோ வைத்தாய் இப்போராட்டத்தை

என்ன செய்வேன் இனிப் புரியவில்லை

“என்கிருபை உனக்குப் போதும்”

என்றுமட்டும் கூறி ஒதுங்கிடாதே!

கூடவே வந்து என்னுடன் போராடு

உன்குணம் என்னில் காணும் வரை!

            15-09-1997. லக்னோ (உ.பி)

 

English Translation

Nothing I lack my Lord

You bestowed everything abundantly

You gave beauty, intellect

And a fine body

Along with wisdom you gave several talents

You gave a life to live with dignity

After giving all these

You gave yourself to redeem me

When you bestowed all these without me asking

Why did you deny the one thing I have sought?

The ‘Aham’ (ego) which lives with to me

Still it remains like a thorn to torment me

Though I requested you to uproot it

For some reason you didn’t show your mercy

Though you have several ways

To show your strength in my weakness

Still you kept this struggle in me

I don’t know what can I do for that

Don’t say that ‘My Grace is sufficient for you’

And continue to stand by

Come and struggle with me

Unless your nature is formed in me.

15-09-1997. Lucknow

 

Comments

The greatest snare that I often faced in my journey in the Lord – the realization of a few talents that I have.  Apart from them, the other natural blessings that God gave me through various means also became a snare and also a point to boast within myself.  When I studied in the Institute back in 1981-82, comparatively, I couldn’t speak English fluently. In the mission fields I was often requested to be the translator not only from English to Tamil but also Tamil to Hindi (and Hindi to Tamil) in several conferences.  The way I can cook, orate, memorize, and other talents gave me an edge over others.  I was always sought out by the leaders to do special task even ignoring several seniors.  Though with much humbleness and gratitude I did my best, yet the secret joy that got within me often raised its head to humiliate me before the Lord.  A few times my heavy headedness hurt others unintentionally.  

One time at Mahdubani, when my junior could not even cook a very simple meal (that day it was his turn to cook) I rebuked him by saying, ‘Don’t you know even this simple task in life?’  Later with many tears he said that he had never cooked in his life.  But justifying my accusation, I said, ‘I too never learnt cooking back at home. I cannot even cook simple rice properly.  But I learnt it as I had to survive’.  Instead of encouraging him patiently to learn it slowly I hurt him by comparing myself with him. There were several such incidents through which I hurt others unintentionally. So when I was reading II Cor. Chapter 12, verses 7-9 hit me very much one day.  Then I wrote this song.